THE BAT
I woke up last night around three o’clock in the morning and heard a rustling sound in my room, coming from the large plastic shopping bag I use to hold my dirty laundry. ‘Oh oh’, I thought, ‘I wonder what that is?’ Given the range of wildlife living in and around my house there were various options, though obviously a mouse or its larger and beefier cousin were the obvious options.
Grabbing the torch from under my pillow, I first tried to see if I could make out what it was without actually leaving the ‘security’ of my mosquito net. No go. Venturing over to the corner, I saw a small animal which I realised was a bat. Given that I have the bat equivalent of the population of Scunthorpe living in my attic, it wasn’t really a surprise that one had eventually ended up down here.
So how do you catch a bat? Every time I moved the light it would scuttle with alarming rapidity and, before I could really come up with a coherent plan, it zoomed under the bed and vanished. I lay down and pointed the torch in but could not see it anywhere. So I did the sensible thing – went into bed, tucked the mosquito net in carefully around me and put my earphones in my ears playing Genesis so the bat wouldn’t wake me up again.
No sign of it in the morning either but, during the day, I threw the puzzle open to my Facebook community. Amalia suggested feeding it fruit gums – a tactic I freely admit I hadn’t thought of but was willing to try if I had had any fruit gums, but I didn’t. My cousin Lorcán suggested hitting it with a bat .... right. Then one of my star former pupils, Julia Caldwell, now a qualified vet, suggested a tupperware container to trap it, all the while warning me about bites, rabies shots and other comforting things.
Returning home it was still light so I figured it wasn’t likely to come out until dark, so I concentrated on making dinner and preparing my stuff for my school visit tomorrow. Then, as the pasta was simmering, I glanced into the bedroom (I had left the door open in case the creature was intelligent enough to actually run out and fly back into the attic) and saw it moving in the corner. Quickly I grabbed a tupperware container and tried to catch it but it scuttled behind the chair and disappeared. Where? I figured either it had moved so fast I hadn’t seen it get under the bed ... or it was in my washbag. How do you check a washbag to see if it has a bat in it? (Alfred: Answers on postcard to BP 129, Butare, Rwanda). Very carefully, is the answer. I got my walking stick (Alfred: And yet again we thank Amy and Eric for their generosity and foresight in providing this) and poked the bag, eventually tipping it over onto the floor and stirring out the contents. After about ten minutes it was clear there was no bat.
And then, just as I was contemplating flailing around under the bed with the stick (Alfred: and just as Alexandre was about to finally be unable to restrain his curiouity and come in and see why his mzungu employer was dancing around his bedroom with a torch in one hand and a lunchbox in the other while kicking furniture around) I saw it by the corner of the door. Quick as a flash (sort of) I whacked the lunchbox down on top of Jeremy (as I had started calling him because he reminded me of Jeremy Thorpe – creepy, scuttling around, grey in the face – I don’t know. Anyone out there – other than Andy Crow – actually know who Jeremy Thorpe was? Nah, didn’t think so) slid the lid under and carried him out onto the porch. Alexandre ran over and I handed him the box saying: ‘Mfite agacurama’, possibly the finest phrase in Kinyarwanda I have yet used (‘I have a bat’). He carried it gently over to the fence and tossed it into the neighbouring field and then took the lunchbox away for a really good scrubbing. And I went and ate my pasta.
Callixte sentenced to thirty years in prison for genocide crimes
As I type this, I hear the BBC World Service announce that the former Interior Minister, Callixte , has been sentenced to thirty years for genocide crimes. He was the organiser of the massacre at Kabuye where I attended the genocide memorial ceremony a few weeks ago – it was he who is said to have encouraged the Tutsi refugees to gather on the hill, assuring them they would be safe there while at the same time organising the Interahamwe forces for one of the largest massacres of the entire genocide.
The Knee
Still no word. Getting pissed off at this stage.
Public Holidays and Work Practice changes, Rwandan-style
Both the 1st July and 4th July are public holidays. Apparently the government has just announced they are being amalgamated on the 4th to save money. They also announced this morning a five-hour weekly increase in every public servant’s working hours, from eight to nine hours a day. No one at my office seemed to mind particularly. Seriously. I even spoke to them one-to-one afterwards and none of them seemed to understand why I thought at least some people might object. Every time I think I am getting a handle on this country .....
Tough choices but a nice weekend
Steve and Nidhi had invited everyone to a party in their house in in Kigali which I would have loved to go to but I had already promised South African John that Andy and I would come up to Gikongoro and watch the rugby match with him. So I spent Friday evening with Andy and Tiga (Chineese food and then Andy and I headed up Saturdayand watched the rugby with South African John, his gorgeous dog Shadow and the local chief of police, Francis, who happened to call in. Francis had never seen rugby before and it was hilarious watch him squirm and flinch every time there was a ruck or maul or scrum. A great match, even if the ‘Boks won – can’t wait for the second test.
Then we headed off to Butare, collected Tiga and went for .... a Chineese meal!! John brought his domestique and guard as well – neither of them had ever been in a restaurant before in their lives, let alone a Chineese one, and John insisted they had to have Chinese food (Alfred: well, what passes for Chinese food here). And they enjoyed it, though Betty was appalled at how long the food took to arrive. The pièce de resistance was the Chicken and Pineapple which comes served in a scooped-out pineapple. I thought Betty was going to wet herself laughing at that one!!
Nice lazy Sunday and then home.
AMAZON BONANZA!
My Amazon shipment arrived! For some reason, whenever I get Amazon stuff, I have to collect it at 0800 on a Friday morning in the presence of a member of the Rwanda Revenue Authority and open it for him to see. I would’t mind this ordinarily except it never happens to anyone else who gets Amazon, and lots of people do!! This means I have to get up early (0530), be at work for when the work bus arrives and hop on it back to Butare, wait around for 0800 and then get my parcel. Luckily my monthly issue of COMHAR has arrived (Irish-language politics and literature magazine) so I was able to read that to pass the time.
But ... it was so worth it!!! Seven books!! I have already read my first one, the first volume of the Matthew Shardlake series by C. J. Sansom – and it was FANTASTIC!!! And I have now started ‘It’s Our Turn To Eat’, a book about corruption in Kenya which looks equally (if differently) promising! Ah, books! And I have two more Shardlakes, a Ugandan novel, The White Tiger and a Victorian murder mystery !! Heaven! Not to mention that I am actually too busy to read much at the moment! Should last me a long time!
ABSENT FRIENDS
Was on Facebook today and was chatting to Heloise Allan. Sobering to think how many of my colleagues I came with are either gone or about to leave! So a few messages! Rosie and Heloise – miss you guys, hope to see you soon again. Tinks – Jacques sends his special regards and hopes you will visit him someday in his new house down near the Burundi border. Francois and Alexis also say ‘Hello’. Lambert got a job in Kigali with some NGO or other – I can send him your email if you like ..... Alain and Berthe leave this weekend, Suzanne, Ivana and Danielle all left early. Love to you all!
I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER
As my very dear friend Tiga-Rose Nercessian said the other day, given that we only have a finite time on this earth, it’s amazing what people will waste their time doing (neither Andy nor I are really in a position to argue the point on this one). I like these pictures and there are thousands more of them at www.icanhascheezburger.com – mostly cats but other animals too. A great way to waste your time!!!
1 comment:
Nice to hear that my Sister is still alive and well, send her my regards.
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